Look Out its Wildlife! Expletive Deleted or, Will there still be honey for tea?

Five years ago we built a conservatory from a kit. It has been a brilliant project and when it is finally finished with a bit of under floor heating it will be one of the most used rooms in the house. Unfortunately, it is also much loved by bees, particularly bumble bees. We are both well aware that these creatures are under threat, and in turn so are we, due to their importance in food production. Unfortunately the bees ( both Bumble and Honey) do not seem to appreciate their own importance.

The trouble is, that once they are in, it is the devils own job to get them back. There are two sky lights, two opening windows, a front door and a set of double doors. Whilst these seem to be very convenient means of access, our humming friends are completely blind as to their utility as a means of escape from being roasted under the double glazed, heat reflecting roof.

Initially we are all sympathy and rush to the waiting implements which we use to evict them. A small rock pool fishing net and a feathery duster on a stick. Once they have landed on the duster, the net is used to trap them while one of the doors is approached. More often than not they make their escape from this device before the said door is reached. Several attempts later the creature is flying away into the garden to continue its important work and we can sink back into an ecological state of self satisfaction with a job well done.

Catching up with the papers can then resume until once again the dreaded buzzing of entrapment starts up once more. The implements, still close at hand, are brought back into action, and the poor bumble bee, since it is they who seem to visit the conservatory more than their honey colleagues, is eventually shaken free just outside the front door. Even before the armchair is reached where the newspaper still awaits a full read, the bumbling bee has made two right hand turns and flown back though the double doors to resume its vain attempt to reach the blue sky by bumping against the glass ceiling. Oh........!!! Expletive deleted. (Please add appropriate word or words of your own choice).

Dacier